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[29 Nov 2007|12:17am] |
so i finally seen sarah today and what i thought was supposed to be a solid goodbye turned into this fucking retarded thing but i made it that way. She didn't have to come over and i shouldnt of had her come over but i let my guard down. i didn't think straight and let this happen. i guess she's something to stare at but i want FUCKING HOLD HER GOSH DAMMIT! that's it. i dont want to fuck her, i want to hold her. i can't hold a conversation with her right now. my eyes are watery as fuck and i know i'm just going to break down if i maintain a conversation because it feels like were so far away and we are. we're in two different worlds. FUCK LOVE! LOVE DOES NOT EXIST! end of story. i should of learned better with alex, i kept my head on straight and i seen i was doing well but fuck it, i wanted to get hurt. if i didnt want to get hurt i would of had her come over here. aghhh! i'm so pissed, not pissed. just bitter towards her. fuck taylor. i can't wait for this awkward as fuck night to end. i want her to fucking leave my life. i'm done
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| oh bab baby |
[18 Nov 2007|04:17pm] |
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new found glory - never snows in floridia |
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so this weeekend was good. the final result to that sarah bullshit is that i suppose everythign happens for a reason. she found a guy that lives in boston and she's apparently goign to move in with him and thats what she's wanted so i say good for. i got to grow up just a little bit more and learned alot and i got to see my bestfriend which ment alot to me since him and i have been on weird talkign terms because of sarah but good for him but now that everyone is happy how about i start on stop making dumb mistakes and start doing something. i think that sounds good to me. alrighty i'm wicked happy =]. latasss -brian
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| so i can tell the truth |
[16 Nov 2007|07:14pm] |
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starting line - almost there, going nowhere |
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suck a fucking dick
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| blah blah blah |
[15 Nov 2007|08:27am] |
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saves the day - third engine |
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i feel like i'm going to mentally breakdown. i can't deal with all of this shit right now =[
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| i was up again till 3 watching tv |
[14 Nov 2007|03:43am] |
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saves the day - can't stay the same |
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so lets see i gave in all my applications today and havent gotten a call. i feel weird about quitting the eagle too but wateves. also, heyy hey! i tried going asleep tonight. i managed to sleep a matter of 2fucking hours WHOOOP WHOOP! so lame. i can't sleep now. i can't stop thinking about sarah and the evil things she's doing underneath the sheets with some faggot named taylor are just haunting. they remind of when i worried about alex. it's so lame =[. blahblahblah i'm done trying to go back to bed
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| guerilla radio |
[13 Nov 2007|01:14am] |
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rent - seasons of love |
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so i quit american eagle today and afterwardds i just felt an emotional downward spiral because i felt like i shouldn't have quit. i kinda felt like i let shaun down but whatever that doesnt matter anymore. i need to get my life on track by doing something. every seems like a permante blurr. gosh dam i feel so lonley. alright enough emo crap from me peaceee
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| sweetness can you believe this? |
[09 Nov 2007|02:02am] |
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BAYSIDE ACOUSTIC BITCHES! |
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so i'm listening to bayside acoustic and it is putting a smile on my face because it putsme in a place remembering last winter me freezing my ass off in clarity's car listening to this drunk hahaha good times =] in other news sarah and i are talking again. i instant messaged her last night after i updated this thing. i've gotten so gay as of late hahaha. i need a girlfriend legit. Rawwwwwwr! ok i'm done, i'm not that bored yet to continue writing pointless shit in here laterrrr
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